Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Oh my God, she CAN read!!!!!

I have experienced a break-through, which I have fully realized today. I have developed an interest in Politics! Strange, I know.

Now let me just preface this by saying that I think I am more interested in the jokes surrounding the current political scandals. I think that the extra time, and lack of reading material stirs my hunger for a newspaper. Admitting to my shameful apathy is a little embarrassing, yet completely warranted since I am a sensitive soul, who has a tendency toward a overwhelming sense of fear and paranoia that sometimes accompanies the absolution of blissful ignorance.

Therefore, my darkness was my choice, and quite an informed choice, but I'm coming out and the light is freakin' halarious!!!!!

So who is this Tom Foley and why is he the butt of everyone's jokes? That's how it started. So he was hitting on underage "House pages"? Now do they mean page, as in Cervantes' secret draft of Don Quixote where Sancho Panza was actually named Sancho GuapJoven? Well, i hope so. Oh those silly Republicans!

These journalists, who I have a sneaking suspicion of being Japanese, cuz of the way they structure these articles, are comparing the scandal to Clinton's escapade while commander in chief. They mentioned a little anecdote I had never heard before regarding this period of the 90's. When asked, "there was absolutely no sex of any kind in any manner, shape, or form?", Clinton's response was "It depends on what your definition of "was" is." Classic! Truly brilliant.

Now onto another big Daily Yomiuri topic--North Korea's atomic blasts. So in a newspaper completely Japan centered, you can imagine how many articles soak into the front page daily. I've learned the following...North Korea takes the UN's sanctions as a declaration of war. Interesting. Also, I find it amazingly interesting that if there is one country more hated by these folk than the U.S., which seems to lead the list of most despised countries among the world, is Japan. Oh, silly Japan!

81% of the Japanese polled in a national survey believe N. Korea to be a real threat. Also interesting that China, N. Korea's closest buddy, has used the kanji "han", in an official statement. Apparently Han means strong opposition, a word they haven't used in regards to world affairs since the US's accidental attack on the Chinese embassy in Belgrade. Oh ya, and what was that all about? I totally forgot about that, somehow that news sunk into my darkened box of self seclusion from World News. China seemed so far away back then, i hardly gave the news any more thought than, "God, the U.S. is retarded."

This morning reading over CaRoRi bar and green tea has fueled my desire to read a North Korean paper in its original North Korean go.

But back to other things I learned from the great DY. So Madonna has jumped onto the Angelina Jolie train of adopting babies of color from 3rd world countries...oh silly Madonna, you and yr biological clock! Can't we just go back to publishing books of your raging Detroitian nudity?

And last but not least, if only the U.S., North Korea, Asia, the middle east, and other Uranium enriching souls, could follow the lead of the ladies sporting the Simple Life. I mean if Paris and Nicole can resolve their differences, can't everybody?

1 comment:

  1. Griselda1:23 PM

    I am impressed that you have taken an open eye at international news. and by the way, Angelina and Madonna stole my idea of adopting a baby from a third world country.